Written by: Samuel K. Sloan (FarPoint Media Executive News Director)

Before I begin this review I first have to be totally honest and say that I am not the world’s greatest horror movie fan. I like them well enough, but prefer a sci-fi or fantasy B-movie over most chiller-thrillers, especially those that have been produced over the last 15 or so years.

Most of today’s horror films rely far too much on slash, burn, cut, rip and gore, all the while the story is either lost in the mayhem or never existed at all. This is a trend that started with the first Friday the 13th film in the 1980’s and shows little sign of letting up anytime soon. Whatever happen to great scary suspense filmmaking on the order of Alfred Hitchcock? No, while I remain a fan of horror novels, the big screen SCARE holds little enticement for me — but, I digress. With that backdrop in place I’ll now forge ahead with my take on Tony Giglio’s “Timber Falls,” which becomes available on DVD May 13, 2008 starring Beth Broderick and Nick Searcy.

The story revolves around a young couple in love (when doesn’t modern horror films center on a young couple, or two…or three). These young folk are hiking in the mountains and while the young lady is skinny-dipping alone in the lake is kidnapped by a serial killing religious nut-case and taken to his family’s inbred cabin. Eventually the couple are forced to become unwilling participants in a bizarre satanic bloody ritual.

The movie doesn’t waste any time displaying its shock-value. It opens with another young couple, the woman lying spread-eagled on a cross-shaped bed, gagged, bloodied, with her hands splayed out in crucified fashion with sharp knives penetrating her palms.

The rest of the 89 minutes of the film isn’t too difficult to figure out from that opening scene, but I sat through it anyway just to be fair to the production company that sent me the DVD to review before its release next week. Fortunately, if you’re reading this, you can be spared 90 minutes you’ll never get back.

To make the film not come off as a total loser, Mr. Giglio does allow our hero and heroine to finally get even with the baddies, though he leaves the film with the worn-out standard slasher close-out for an unneeded and, dare I say, unwanted sequel.

There is an old adage: “If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.” Good advice.

The best I can do for “Timber Falls” is give it a 1 out of 5 rating.

Genre: Action/Adventure, Science Fiction/ Fantasy and Adaptation
Running Time: 129 min.
Theatrical Release Date: May 9th, 2008
MPAA Rating: PG for sequences of action, some violence, language and brief smoking.
Directed By: The Wachowski Brothers
Starring: Emile Hirsch, Susan Sarandon, Christina Ricci, John Goodman, Matthew Fox

The instant the movie starts we’re introduced to a psychedelic world where fast cars reign supreme and the laws of physics have long been lost. A playground where the color spectrum has evolved (but not the weaponry) plays host to hyperkinetic and dizzyingly dangerous races where literally anything is possible – especially the impossible. The only thing faster than the cars is the speed at which realism flies out the door, but the Wachowski Brothers have managed to create yet another world unlike any other.

As a youth, Speed Racer (Emile Hirsch) could think of nothing but the thrill of driving and one day becoming just like his famous racecar driver brother, Rex (Scott Porter). His dreams are almost shattered when tragedy befalls his sibling, but fate intervenes and Speed eventually fulfills his lifelong goal of racing. But his skills catch the eye of nefarious entrepreneur Royalton (Roger Allam) who propositions the young racer with a dastardly ultimatum – race for Royalton Industries or never race again. Determined to defy the scheming extortionist, Speed must face almost certain death in the most dangerous no-holds-barred race of all time – the Casa Cristo Classic 5000. But with the help of the mysterious Racer X, and the support of his family and girlfriend Trixie (Christina Ricci), the exceptional Racer might just be able to bring honor back to the sport he so loves.

Speed Racer takes the cake for being the most stylistic and unimaginably colorful film ever to grace the screen. Unfortunately, that’s the very reason that viewers may turn away from the famous anime-turned-movie. Utilizing more green-screen work than perhaps any other film to date, the backgrounds are almost completely computer generated, as are all of the fantastical racing scenes. New colors must have been invented for the film just to paint the psychedelically bright visuals, and by the conclusion, no law of gravity, physics, momentum, motion, or weight remains unbroken.

The racing scenes are like Star Wars’ podracing, without the realism…of which there is no realism. Cars spin, bounce, jump, flip, and dance about with no respect for preconceived notions of believable vehicular movement. During the hazardous Casa Cristo race, all of the racecars are equipped with signature James Bond gadgets and weaponry – but in Speed Racer it feels like we’re watching a round of Crash Bandicoot racing instead of action-packed high-speed pursuits. It’s understandable that the creators wanted to portray a form of breakneck racing unlike anything witnessed on the big screen before, but the drivers are not superhuman; and yet every maneuver they incorporate into the roller coaster racetrack seems practical only for those with an acute understanding of The Force – or perhaps for cartoon characters.

And essentially Speed Racer is about as close to a live-action cartoon as it gets. Nothing remains within the boundaries of realism, and the maddeningly stylized editing further supports the idea that the characters are about as vulnerable to real life as a cartoon. Traditional animation is mixed into early scenes with Spritle (Speed’s younger brother) and his pet Chim-Chim (not unlike the opening scene of Son of Rambow, also out this month), scenes are overlayed onto one another with faces and characters sliding across the screen while the backgrounds remain motionless, and the familiar styles of anime fighting are realized in comically edited scenes of slow-motion, sped-up shots, and all methods of disorienting juxtaposition.

While the story is decent, the effects are outlandish, and the characters are basically nonsensical, ultimately, if you’re a child, there really is no reason to watch Speed Racer – and if you’re a teen, Trixie is about the only reason to view this astronomically unreal racing adventure.

- The Massie Twins
SCORE = 6/10
MoviePulse.net

The first superhero movie of 2008 is Iron Man, and this one is a good way to start the summer movie season.

Iron Man is based on the Marvel comic of the same name, and follows industrialist/billionaire playboy Tony Stark as he journeys from being just a celebrity businessman and weapons designer to someone who chooses to do something about changing the world his inventions have helped create after experiencing first-hand the destructive consequences of the weapons his company has been building and selling.

The movie storyline uses current day updates of many of the major plot points from the comic: Stark being critically injured in a war zone; having a scientist save his life by building a makeshift device to keep his heart going, and also help him build the first version of the armored suit; weighing the ethics of manufacturing weapons; and enduring trials and tribulations over the control and ownership of Stark Industries, among other things.

Comic book purists might gripe about some aspects of the use and mixing of different elements from different times from the comic, but newcomers to the Iron Man universe won’t be lost or confused, which was one complaint I’d heard from non-fans about the first X-Men movie. It also serves as a good introduction to the main protagonists, and a teaser intro for S.H.I.E.L.D. Alas, no Samuel L. Jackson cameo as Nick Fury that I caught.

The extensive scenes that focus on Tony Stark designing, redesigning and perfecting the suit are not only fun, but give viewers a look into the mechanical and design genius of Tony Stark.

There’s a playful quality that Robert Downey Jr brings to the portrayal of Stark that wonderfully balances the darker aspects of Stark’s character that are merely hinted at, and that can be attributed to Downey, period. I have mixed feelings on the quick introduction and demise of Iron Monger, though. Jeff Bridges lent weight to an Obediah Stone that went completely unexplored. I’m not sure what else could have been done to bring more to that part of the story without making the movie overlong, but to me, that felt like the only real missing piece.

The development of James Rhodes seems to have been trimmed down from originally intended, but the spirit of the character is still there, and there’s one scene with Rhodes and an earlier version of the suit that Tony had built that will have longtime fans smiling. Hopefully, the producers will give Terrance Howard much more screen time in the sequel.

This is a fun summer movie, and it might even keep the robot suit fans happy until the next Transformers movie comes out. As a comic book superhero fan, this one more than satisfies as an opening chapter in an ongoing story, and in my opinion, does so better than the first X-Men movie did. I’m even looking forward to seeing how they work Tony Stark and S.H.I.E.L.D. into the Incredible Hulk movie coming along next month.

Summer Brooks

Genre: Action/Adventure, Science Fiction/Fantasy and Adaptation
Running Time: 126 min.
Theatrical Release Date: May 2nd, 2008
MPAA Rating: PG-13 for some intense sequences of sci-fi action and violence, and brief suggestive content.
Directed By: Jon Favreau
Starring: Robert Downey Jr., Terrence Howard, Jeff Bridges, Shaun Toub, Leslie Bibb, and Gwyneth Paltrow

Wisely adapting the most reality-grounded aspects of Tony Stark’s origins and adventures to becoming the “Golden Avenger,” Jon Favreau has brilliantly balanced the elements that create an entertaining movie – let alone an enjoyable superhero movie. With a competent cast of A-list actors, Iron Man should easily please both die-hard fans of the superhero as well as general audiences seeking an epic thrillride.

Arrogant, womanizing playboy Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr.) has it all – beautiful women, a powerful weapons-manufacturing company, and more money than he knows what to do with. On a business trip to Afghanistan, Stark’s convoy is ambushed and the billionaire is taken hostage by terrorists, while also sustaining a life-threatening injury. With the aid of fellow prisoner Yinsen (Shaun Toub), Stark tricks his captors into believing he will agree to their demands of building a dangerous missile – instead he devises a technologically advanced robotic suit of armor to assist in their escape. Once freed, Stark reevaluates his life’s work and the lethal side effects of his company’s intentions that he so blindly ignored. Constructing an even more elaborate and effective suit, Stark becomes Iron Man and vows to save those he has placed in harm’s way.

As with the origins film of any superhero franchise, plenty of care must be taken with the development of the primary protagonists. Favreau has found a delicate balance between back story and high-flying adventure, leaving Iron Man void of any dull moments. Action junkies may find the number of fight sequences a little on the slim side, but Stark’s transformation from selfish playboy to noble superhero is interesting enough to counteract the lack of nonstop explosions – in fact, the final showdown of the film is actually rather underwhelming when compared to the engaging progression of Stark’s character.

While it may be true to an extent that Robert Downey Jr. has fallen into the steady path of playing himself in every movie, those with a healthy knowledge of the comics will likely concur that Downey’s portrayal of the fast-talking, sarcastically quirky Tony Stark is exactly as it should be. Stark’s character is believable, flawed, and realistic – one easily identifiable with and worth rooting for in the battle against evil – and Downey Jr. has found the perfect equilibrium of quick wit and confident bravado for his armored superhero. A surprising amount of humor has found its way into Iron Man, primarily thanks to Downey’s assured performance and his interactions with an equally able cast. Gwyneth Paltrow as Stark’s clever assistant Pepper Potts holds her own against Downey’s scene-stealing verbal antics, and even Terrence Howard gets to deliver some slick exchanges. An almost unrecognizable Jeff Bridges injects the immoral Obadiah Stane with enough cunning maliciousness to create a worthy opponent for Stark (only going slightly overboard in the film’s climax).

Virtually all comic-based entities will bear harsh scrutiny from the legions of faithful fans, and Iron Man is no different. Favreau’s decision to adapt the Golden Avenger’s reality-based escapades to create a more believable hero should please newcomers, while longtime fans of the character will enjoy the numerous winks and nods thrown in especially for those already familiar with Iron Man lore. Since events in the comics involve everything from time travel to alien dragons, slight artistic changes to the superhero’s origins for the sake of a wider audience should be expected and not entirely unwelcome. Certainly many minor inconsistencies and faults (such as an over dependency on technology to solve problems) can be dissected by excessive analysis, but for its ability to produce pure, mesmerizing entertainment, Iron Man is a glowing success and a promising start for both the crimson hero and this year’s summer blockbusters.

- Joel Massie
SCORE = 9/10
MoviePulse.net

Don’t forget to tune-in to this weekend’s Slice of SciFi show for an “Iron Man” review from our very own Summer Brooks.

Written by: BEN FRITZ for Variety

Grand Theft Auto IV (Rated M. $60 [USD])

Gamers can explore a lifelike replica of Gotham in ‘Grand Theft Auto IV’

A Rockstar Games presentation of a game developed by Rockstar North for the Playstation 3 and Xbox 360. Reviewed on Xbox 360.

Screenshots:
• Gallery I

Related links: The Cut Scene

“Grand Theft Auto IV” marks a huge leap forward for videogames as an immersive experience while making little more than a few tweaks to the ultra-successful franchise’s formula. The technological prowess and artistic detail are so phenomenal and the sheer amount of content is so staggeringly deep that players will find themselves drawn into Liberty City like no other fictional place. Such deep immersion sometimes highlights the flaws in “Grand Theft Auto’s” well-worn formula, but that will be little more than an asterisk for the millions of gamers sure to be carjacking their way through “GTA IV” for a long, long time to come.

Like the last few “GTA” installments, the game follows a tough-as-nails newcomer working his way up in a city full of crazy characters, sexy women and endless opportunities to cause mayhem. The game opens with a man getting off a boat in Liberty City, a significantly downsized but amazingly lifelike replica of New York. Protagonist Niko Bellic, who’s succinctly described as “a drug dealing de-fucking-generate from some armpit in Eastern Europe,” is in town to start a new life and, players slowly discover, make up for sins in his past.

But while Niko is the only fresh-faced foreigner in the game, the ideal of the American Dream that immigrants represent is the theme that runs through it. Every character in “GTA IV” is hustling and scheming for that elusive success that’s always just out of their grasp. “One day,” Niko’s cousin Roman vows at one point, “I’ll find that shortcut to the top.”

While Niko speaks primarily with his fists and weapons, he’s surrounded by the funniest cast of characters this side of “The Office.” From the delusional Roman, who’s convinced success is his before it arrives, to Brucie, a crazy steroid junkie with a bad habit of bashing his head into walls, to the media-savvy Manny, who boasts to his personal cameraman about how he’s saving South Bronx while Niko does his dirty work, they all create a living, breathing and surprisingly hilarious world. Though the stiff animation in the game’s frequent pre-animated cut scenes serves them poorly, writers Dan Houser and Rupert Humphries demonstrate that, unlike most videogame writers, they understand that a good story starts with great characters.

The “GTA” series fundamentally altered the videogame world years ago by creating a huge open world that players could explore at their own pace with no loading times. “GTA IV” ups the ante by rendering it all in hi-def with extreme detail and barely any technical glitches. All of New York’s major landmarks, like Central Park, the Empire State Building and JFK Airport, are present, as are local touches in every neighborhood. Even more astounding, however, is that Liberty City is a living, breathing city. Early morning in the South Bronx is marked by garbage trucks on their routes, junky cars parked on the side of the road, and homeless men huddled over makeshift fires, while afternoon Manhattan is a morass of sharply dressed business folks and luxury cars stuck in traffic.

Playing through the main story could easily take 40 hours, but there’s a virtually unlimited amount of game for those who want to explore every bar, every comedy club — and every hooker. (The game is rated M for a reason.)

(Read more…)

Review by: Michael Hickerson (SoSF assistant editor)

One of the assets of the Sontarans as a returning monster/villian for Doctor Who is that while they are easily identified with the classic run of the show, they’re not a “staple” of the original series in the same way the Daleks or Cybermen were.

I say this because it gives the writers and production staff a bit more freedom to explore the Sontarans without the danger of honking off the hard-core fans of the original series. That said, you can’t just insert the Sontarans into any random story and have it work. (For an example of this, see “The Two Doctors”). Because of that, I’m glad to see that the production team and writing staff seems to have put some time and thought into a story that would benefit from bringing back the Sontarans and not just be an excuse to bring them back for the inevitable “old foe is back” publicity train.

I’ve got to admit I was a bit nervous headed into “The Sontaran Stratagem.” A couple of factors contributed to this. One is that I didn’t much care for Helen Raynor’s two part story last year with the Daleks. Another is I was worried about how the return of UNIT might play out. And finally, I was concerned about the reasoning from bringing back the Sontarans.

The good news is that, so far, the story hasn’t done anything to set off red-alert claxons in my mind. But I also have to admit I liked the first half of Raynor’s two-part Dalek story last year, while I found it completely feel apart in the second half.

But enough worrying about next week. What worked here? (Read more…)

Genre: Action/Adventure and Science Fiction/Fantasy
Running Time: 1 hr. 53 min.
Theatrical Release Date: April 18th, 2008
MPAA Rating: PG-13 for for sequences of martial arts action and some violence.
Directed By: Rob Minkoff
Starring: Jackie Chan, Jet Li, Michael Angarano, Liu Yifei, Li Bingbing, Collin Chou

How long have we waited to see Jackie Chan and Jet Li finally get pitted against one another on the big screen? How could their long-awaited collaboration be anything but smashingly sensational? The only way to embarrassingly shatter our images of Jackie Chan and Jet Li finally dueling (with a wide array of masterfully choreographed fight sequences) would be to put them in a fantastical Tolkienesque world, brimming with immortals, prophecies, CG-laden magic and time travel. So that’s what The Forbidden Kingdom does.

Kung fu consumed American teen Jason Tripitikas (Michael Angarano) must travel back in time to reunite a golden staff with its rightful owner - the Monkey King. In his quest to bring order back to the ancient Chinese world he has teleported to, he is aided by Lu Yan (Jackie Chan), an immortal who uses wine and drunken fighting to gain the upper hand; Sparrow (Yifei Liu), a young female warrior whose parents were killed by the injurious ruler known as the Jade Warlord; and Silent Munk (Jet Li), a guardian who is also on a mission to retrieve the staff.

The Monkey King has been imprisoned in stone for 500 years, and his only hope of restoring peace to ancient China is to regain his legendary weapon. Jason undergoes numerous adventures during his journey to the Temple of the 5 Elements, where the immortal Jade Warlord resides with his massive army, including fighting off hundreds of soldiers, and a white-haired demoness with a deadly whip.

All of the colorful and chaotic characters in the film are based on Chinese mythology, adventure pulps, and classic kung fu movies, but the average viewer isn’t going to notice. You would have to be as obsessed as the ambivalent main character to recognize the borrowed concepts from ancient Chinese legend and lore. What the average viewer will undoubtedly notice is the extreme goofiness of the story, all of the plot holes that typically accompany such fantasy fare, and the many quick zooms on ominous faces and statuesque martial arts stances. And perhaps question why Jason already knows how to ride a horse, or why a Jet Li/Jackie Chan movie actually stars a scrawny American boy.

Drenched in eye-rolling fantasy jargon (such as chi magic) and grossly stereotypical characters, the plot is somewhat reminiscent of The Wizard of Oz or Black Knight (the Martin Lawrence film) insomuch as the lead character journeys to a fantasy world designed to match an overactive imagination. Fueled by fanciful yearnings for adventure and excitement, Jason explores lavish settings, including a merciless desert, luscious rainforests, and humongous stone temples, where Woo-Ping Yuen’s stunning fight choreography can look very impressive. In an unbelievable world, the fighting gets equally farfetched, and so wire-fu sequences tend to overtake realistic brawling, constantly breaking up the marvel of watching two legendary martial arts masters finally square off.

The costumes are divine, the snowy-haired Asian-Jessica-Alba demoness is an interesting nemesis, and comedic training montages are abundant, but The Forbidden Kingdom forgets to show us entertainment. Lu Yan remarks that to be remembered is true immortality – which makes it a crying shame that this pitiable film will probably be the only thing to remind us of Jackie Chan and Jet Li’s only movie collaboration.

- The Massie Twins
SCORE = 4/10
MoviePulse.net

Review by: Michael Hickerson (SoSF Assistant Editor)

When I was younger, I couldn’t wait for Doctor Who SPOILERs. Of course, in my younger days, in the dark time before the world-wide web, the only real source of SPOILER information I had came from Doctor Who Magazine. And while it was a good source for tidbits about upcoming stories (yes, I am old enough to recall when the original series was still in production), they weren’t quite the massive, season-ruining SPOILERs that can easily be found with a few clicks of the mouse today.

When it comes to Doctor Who today, I try my best to avoid the big SPOILERs (though some on-line sources make it hard to do that). I do like to have a thumbnail of an idea of what’s coming, including title and writer. But beyond that, I really, really don’t want to know.

It gives the series a chance to pleasantly surprise me. It happened last year with “Deadlock” and this week with “The Planet of the Ood.”

At first I thought about starting out this review, calling out the new series for its lack of ability to create a truly interesting, recurring alien race or monster. What happened to the good old days when we had a plethora of various foes to draw on for the good Doctor to do battle with? Where were the next series of menacing aliens or scary monsters to drive the children behind the sofa?

And no, the Slytheen don’t count.

(Read more…)

Genre: Comedy and Science Fiction/Fantasy
Running Time: 1 hr. 34 min.
Theatrical Release Date: April 18th, 2008
MPAA Rating: R for strong violence and gore, sexuality/nudity and language.
Directed By: Jay Lee
Starring: Robert Englund, Jenna Jameson, Roxy Saint, Joey Medina, Shamron Moore

While there’s several individual elements to like about Zombie Strippers, it feels like director Jay Lee added in too many contradictory ingredients and then didn’t leave the blender on long enough. The sexuality shifts from placid erotica to disturbing decadence, the humor wavers between utterly silly to downright vulgar, and the acting ranges from over-the-top to porn star (which is what the majority of the actresses are). Maybe there isn’t a whole lot to like about this film after all.

When a group of mercenary soldiers are called in to exterminate the threat of a deadly chemo-virus outbreak in a research lab, one of their own is exposed to the zombifying disease. To avoid execution, the renegade soldier escapes to a nearby strip club where disease-paranoid owner Ian (Robert Englund) manages a group of rivalrous strippers. Succumbing to the infection, the mercenary ends up taking a generous bite out of Kat (Jenna Jameson) and unpredictably the zombified stripper becomes an even bigger hit at the club. Realizing the monetary potential of zombie strippers, Ian exploits the resurrected girls – but things quickly get out of hand as the ravenous appetites of the undead strippers steadily diminishes the number of raving customers.

When the cast contains primarily well-known porn stars, the promised erotica becomes a definite draw. And such nudity is certainly delivered as each girl gets her own lengthy strip scene both before and after the reactivation of dead tissue. However it’s here that the film takes a mortifying turn towards the unsettling as the zombie strippers rapidly decay – and there’s nothing sexy about seeing copious amounts of destroyed flesh. Perhaps this irony is Lee’s cunning punishment to his audience for participating in such a voyeuristic affair – but it’s probably just for the gross-out factor.

The film is also filled with plenty of humor, but of the kind that is largely hit-or-miss. Attempting to overload the audience with racial, religious, slapstick, pop culture and crass jokes, more often than not they simply don’t pack a punch. At one point the Mexican janitor Paco (Joey Medina) is seen armed to the teeth like Pancho Villa, bidding his mule farewell. Either you’ll find the scene humorous, or you won’t – the entire film can essentially be summed up in just that fashion.

All of the strippers engage in meaningless conversations about existentialism, fatalism, and other philosophical doctrines, probably in the attempt to satirize the events that unfold. But considering that so much time is spent simply trying to unsettle the audience, or showcase the physical talents of the nude pole-dancers, any meaningful cynicism is immediately lost. At least the gore, violence and prosthetics are all superbly portrayed – up until the computer animated blood erases all that hard work from our memories.

Third-rate dialogue, third-rate acting, third-rate storytelling, and first-rate nudity accounts for all of the appeal of Zombie Strippers. The film is made for a single distinct crowd, and promises entertainment only to those who expect nothing more than what was eluded to in the theatrical trailer.

- The Massie Twins
SCORE = 3/10
MoviePulse.net

After a stretch of three episodes that were hit or miss, I have to admit I was staring to lose a bit of faith in Doctor Who.

Thankfully, this week’s story “The Fires of Pompeii” while not an instant classic along the lines of last year’s “Blink” or “Human Nature/The Family of Blood” was still enough of a step in the right direction and a return to form that my initial reservations about series four have been calmed. Well, most of them.

The Doctor and Donna travel back in time to the day before Pompeii is destroyed by Mount Vesuvius. When the TARDIS is sold by a Pompeii merchant, the Doctor and Donna must race against time to find it and escape the city. This conflict, which felt a lot like the earliest days of the William Hartnell historical stories, drives the first ten or so minutes of the story and the opens up some more interesting questions about the Doctor’s role in exploring history and what can and can’t be changed. (Read more…)

Written by: Michael Hickerson (SoSF assistant editor)

I have to admit that as series four of the new Doctor Who approached, I was having a hard time mustering up the same level of enthusiasm I had four years ago when we got “Rose” or two years ago for “New Earth” or even last year with “Smith and Jones.” Based on the limited information I heard about the upcoming season, I found myself intrigued by the return of the Sontarans and curious about the new two-parter by Hugo-winner Steven Moffat.

But beyond that, I just wasn’t feeling it this year. And a large part of that came down to a casting choice made by the production team.

I just couldn’t find a lot positive about the return of Donna as played by Catherine Tate. I have nothing against Tate and I’m not familiar with any of her other work. But based on last year’s “The Runaway Bride” I was finding it hard to really get enthusiastic about an entire season of travels through time and space with Donna and the Doctor.

Warning: SPOILERS after the jump (Read more…)

Genre: Comedy, Animation
Running Time: 75 min.
DVD Release Date: March 25th, 2008
MPAA Rating: Not Rated
Directed By: Bernie Denk
Starring: Stephen Root, Jenny McCarthy, Maurice LaMarche, John Melendez

Tripping the Rift has always had a cult following for its creative parodies of sci-fi favorites coupled with brazen language and generous doses of sexual deviance. With three seasons under its belt, the show heads to DVD with the Tripping the Rift Movie (which is actually like three episodes strung together by a slightly connecting storyline).

Tripping the Rift’s style lends itself to half-hour episodes, and while the movie retains the feeling of just watching three in a row, it doesn’t offer anything too original for those expecting the subtitle to really mean anything. Much like a Star Trek in South Park, the outlandish antics and absurd predicaments the main crew of zany characters find themselves in comprise the majority of the entertainment. Chode (Stephen Root) is the three-eyed blobby purple alien captain whose insatiable sexual appetite and very un-sugarcoated dialogue provides the lowest point of the show’s maturity, but also the funniest. Pleasure droid Six (Jenny McCarthy) offers the brains and the looks behind their operations and is usually the target of gratuitous sexual references. The gay robot Gus (Maurice LeMarche) manages a few laughs here and there, and both the hideous bovine alien T’nuk and wimpy lizard Whip generally just get annoying. Main villain Darph Bobo (a clown-like Vader knockoff) doesn’t always impress, but is definitely more appealing than the sub-villains introduced throughout the movie that exude the very essence of all that is dismal and revolting.

The major appeal of the TV show lies in the edgy quips and ludicrous parodies (along with frequent hints of nudity from the unnaturally jiggly female android Six), but more so here than in random episodes the humor is noticeably hit-or-miss. Unexpected interjections and offbeat rants from Chode are easily the most entertaining bits, but everything from gay jokes to breaking out into song and dance find their way into this Rift. The parodies used in the movie are a little too cliché and rarely will the grimace change to a laugh, but fans of the series will undoubtedly follow these characters to whatever unlikely locations they end up.

Special Features:

The DVD Special Features include a short “making-of” featurette which is, in reality, just a series of short interviews with the main voice actors. This otherwise throwaway feature becomes essential viewing when the camera turns to Jenny McCarthy (replacing Carmen Electra as the voice of Six) who points out the shared attributes with her animated character, including being built for sex, multi-orgasmic, and showcasing a heaving bosom. A theatrical trailer rounds out the special features, however those fortunate enough to purchase their copy from Best Buy can get the bonus disc “The Best of Six,” which contains three episodes based around the buxom android beauty, which are actually better than those that comprise the movie.

Overall:

The foul-mouthed characters spouting crude jokes and obscenities will appeal to fans of the series, but newcomers may find the offbeat humor and immature spoofing difficult to swallow. The individual episodes of the seasons are more effectively paced and ultimately more entertaining, but those buying the movie will definitely want to pick up the Best Buy exclusive with the bonus episodes.

- Joel Massie
SCORE = 4/10
MoviePulse.net

Genre: Action/Adventure, Thriller
Running Time: 1 hr. 40 min.
Theatrical Release Date: March 14th, 2008 (wide)
MPAA Rating: R for strong bloody violence, language and some sexual content/nudity.
Directed By: Neil Marshall
Starring: Rhona Mitra, Bob Hoskins, Alexander Siddig, Adrian Lester, Sean Pertwee

Perhaps Doomsday was a bad movie to start with. It had all the trimmings of one. With its campy, post apocalyptic story, the genre film was already a target of studio scrutiny. When Neil Marshall showed Universal his disjointed director’s cut the studio probably hit the panic button. The solution, gut the film so that it fits a running time of under a hundred minutes. The result is a product that can cram a large audience into theaters over opening weekend, but what they will ultimately find is one of the worst movies of this, or any year.

When an epidemic virus spreads across Britain, decimating the population, the government is forced to seal off the hot zone, sacrificing thousands of civilians to save millions. Nearly thirty years later the Reaper virus appears again, but this time in central London. With panic spreading throughout the masses, the government sanctions an elite military strike force to search the infected area for a cure. What lies waiting for the team is a small population of survivors ruled by sheer anarchy.

What made Neil Marshall’s last film, The Descent, so engaging was not the claustrophobic fear or special effects, but the exceptionally well told story. With fantastic character development for its genre, combined with an evenly paced plot, Doomsday pales in comparison to its predecessor. Calling Doomsday schizophrenic is an understatement. The film changes tone and styles repeatedly throughout the picture’s relatively short duration, never giving each moment time to develop.

Speaking of development, whoever chopped down the theatrical release of Doomsday managed to dissect the film so that it is literally an hour and forty minutes of pure action. While this might sound like a sugar rush of fun for action fiends, be warned, while Doomsday is a very good looking film, with gritty and vibrant cinematography, there is absolutely zero intensity in the events that play out on screen.

So with high speed car chases, cannibals and heavily armored knights all in the same movie, how could this be? The simple reason is that Marshall’s film never gives us any reason to care about the characters on screen. As Major Sinclair, Rhona Mitra gives an extremely monotone performance. Just because you’re playing an uber bad ass does not mean inflection should be negated. While the actress was quite striking visually in her tight, black spandex, the rationale for her character’s final decision is highly unmotivated.

Another important element that seems to have been ripped out of this cut of the film was a love story shared between the team’s doctor and the young girl that hosts the cure, Cally. We see the medical practitioner go to extreme lengths to protect Cally, however the only inkling of a romantic connection between the two comes when the love birds collide accidentally. Aside from this brief shot that lasts for only a handful of seconds, the audience is expected to believe in their connection for the remainder of the film.

Despite the character and story flaws though, at least the action and special effects play our well, right? Wrong. While there are a few bits of fun gore sprinkled lightly throughout the film, all other logistics are thrown out the window. Why the survivors of the plague have reverted to medieval weapons when army bases have been left open, ripe for pillaging, is beyond rationale. Why a high end Bentley cannot outrun a collection of beat up, sloppy jalopies will also raise doubts. How the very same car can go crashing through a bus, and come out completely unscathed is even more unfathomable.

Whoever managed to piece together the action scenes did an equally horrendous job. With little motivation to cut from one shot to another, and breaking nearly every editing rule in the book, the majority of the violence is so poorly compiled it is difficult to watch. To top it off, unmotivated camera moves, like snap zooms and angles shot upside-down, quickly draw the viewer out of the picture.

With two solid movies to his credit, one would like to think that the filmmaker who brought Doomsday to light is not the same director that created Dog Soldiers and The Descent. While this action flick might never have been a good movie, the obvious plot holes and horrendous film editing scream of a motion picture that has panicked studio finger prints all over it. One has to wonder if this theatrical release really is Neil Marshall’s definitive Doomsday, or like the Reaper virus, if the director’s cut will be quarantined for good.

-Joe Russo
SCORE = 1/10
MoviePulse.net

Genre: Drama, Suspense/Horror, Thriller and Remake
Running Time: 1 hr. 52 min.
Theatrical Release Date: March 14th, 2008
MPAA Rating: R for terror, violence and some language.
Directed By: Michael Haneke
Starring: Naomi Watts, Tim Roth, Brady Corbet, Devon Gearhart, Michael Pitt

Back in 1997 German director Michael Haneke made Funny Games, a disturbing and thought-provoking thriller that toys with the viewer’s place as a voyeur. In 2008, the re-make, also directed by Haneke, debuts with an all new cast and this time in English. The problem is that it is essentially a shot-for-shot, line-for-line, verbatim re-shoot. This makes watching this film pointless if you’ve seen the original, or unnecessary to watch the original if you’re planning on seeing the 2008 version. And despite those pesky subtitles that often upset American audiences, the original’s authenticity and casting is surprisingly superior.

Anne (Naomi Watts) and George (Tim Roth) arrive at their vacation home ready to enjoy some golf and sailing with their son (Devon Gearhart) and neighbors. As Anne is unpacking groceries, she is confronted by two young men, dressed in golf attire, and wearing white gloves. Thinking nothing of their politeness and harmless asking for eggs, explaining that the neighbors ran out of cooking materials, Anne immediately helps them. But when the two boys begin obviously antagonizing her, she realizes that their family is about to be taken hostage for a terrifying night of anything but “funny” games.

The same opening overhead shot of a car (this time an SUV) driving down a desolate highway while the family inside plays a game of guessing opera tunes, opens the film. The same opera pieces are used, the same title sequence and the same ear-piercing abstract death metal. The film is undoubtedly disturbing, unique and white-knuckle suspenseful, but if you’ve seen the original, there’s nothing new. The breed of dog changed, along with the style of phone (from mobile to cellular), but the house’s white gate looks almost completely identical, and the kitchen and all of its seemingly random decorations are all a perfect match. Georg and Anna have been altered to their American counterparts George and Anne, and some of the original translations have been reinterpreted (such as fatty to tubby and cheeky to rude).

What makes this remake only slightly more successful than Gus Van Sant’s famously horrendous turn with Hitchcock’s Psycho is that Funny Games was never that well known. Taking what many believe to be one of the greatest films of all time (Psycho) and re-doing it scene for scene is so utterly pointless, it’s a wonder the idea was ever even carried out. At least with Funny Games the reasons are more coherent. Making a German film more accessible for American audiences through the use of English speaking actors isn’t entirely inane.

Devoid of an omniscient soundtrack and played out to feel like real-time, the events of this one freakish night is quite a distressingly entertaining ordeal. Regardless of the superiorities that are evident in the original, this version isn’t without its shock value and thought-provoking commentary on voyeurism and violence. But with its unexpectedly appalling conclusion, bizarre plot twists and the unexplainable interference with the “fourth wall” (a.k.a. having characters talk directly to the audience), Funny Games may very well be a film that could never have been truly accepted by American audiences in the first place.

- The Massie Twins
SCORE = 3/10
MoviePulse.net

Written by: Samuel K. Sloan (FarPoint Media Executive News Director)

The other day I was sent the DVD copy of the film “Appleseed ExMachina” to look at and review.

The film is an animated feature that takes the art of Japanese manga to the next level and I was thoroughly entertained for 90 minutes.

However, as I was sitting there watching this feature I had the distinct feeling I had been there and seen most of what was on the screen before. “Appleseed” is its own unique mixture of the series creator Shirow Masamune’s “Ghost in the Shell,” with some elements from “DOOM,” the “Matrix” trilogy, a touch of “Dune” and a dab of “The Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within.”

I’m not complaining mind you, because I have enjoyed every one of those entries on different levels, but it did feel like I was treading on familiar ground.

The story of “Appleseed ExMachina” takes place in the year AD 2133, a time when humankind has risen from the ashes of worldwide non-nuclear disaster and from the ruins has arisen the mighty, and wonderous city-state of Olympus. Watching over the citizens and keeping them safe is an elite force of police-soldiers that are a creation of robotic humanoids, or Bioroids, with enhanced capabilities. They comprise the force known as ESwat Special Forces.

Every Eden story must have its serpent and Olympus is no exception. There are cybernetic “devils” out to destroy its calm, order and beauty and it is up to ESwat and the film’s protagonists Deunan, Briareos and Tereus to maintain order and keep Olympus from plunging into the ancient days of chaos and darkness.

Based on the popular Japanese manga series by Shirow Masamune (Seishinsha), John Woo and Shinji Aramaki remarkably merge their talents into one pervading force to create this futuristic thriller that many should find, fun interesing and very entertaining.

The animation is par excellence’ and takes a back seat to no one. The script is compelling enough and the English voice dubbing is adequate, although I would have preferred they left the original Japanese actors do their parts and used subtitles. However, with all the action constantly taking place on the screen, I can see where that may have become a distraction.

“Appleseed ExMachina” is a very good movie and one that I recommend to every one who enjoys good animation with an action-packed script.

On the Slice of SciFi scale of 0 to 5 stars I give “Appleseed ExMachina”